A Press Release...
_____________________
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
April 11, 2006
Contact: Joseph Moss
Director of Humor
MOSS ANNOUNCES FUNDING TO CORPORATION TO STUDY THE PURPOSE OF LIFE IN GENERAL AND YOURS IN PARTICULAR
YORKTOWN, VA--His Loftiness Joseph Moss, Esq., announced today that the Department of Classified Funding Operations (DCFO) has awarded a substantial grant (amount classified) to the corporation of Joseph Moss Enterprises to analyze in detail the purpose of life in general and yours in particular.
“Funding of this nature is to be encouraged whole-heartedly, and so long as we don’t know where the money comes from, we all stand to benefit substantially,” said Mr. Moss. “I look forward with great anticipation to the outcome of this study. The results will definitely be illuminating and possibly shocking which will alter the balance of stress somewhat. We all will learn a great deal from this deserving corporation’s research.”
This study of life purpose will consider where the universe is, how favorite colors affect anything, when the party ought to begin, who will become Prime Minister of Lithuania, why there are no Martian women, and what eggplants are doing here anyway. These issues will first be addressed from the perspective of the general populace (who will be canvassed inadequately to ascertain their position), and then from your particular situation. In order to promote peace and stability, information must be created to allow for general understanding.
# # #
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
April 11, 2006
Contact: Joseph Moss
Director of Humor
MOSS ANNOUNCES FUNDING TO CORPORATION TO STUDY THE PURPOSE OF LIFE IN GENERAL AND YOURS IN PARTICULAR
YORKTOWN, VA--His Loftiness Joseph Moss, Esq., announced today that the Department of Classified Funding Operations (DCFO) has awarded a substantial grant (amount classified) to the corporation of Joseph Moss Enterprises to analyze in detail the purpose of life in general and yours in particular.
“Funding of this nature is to be encouraged whole-heartedly, and so long as we don’t know where the money comes from, we all stand to benefit substantially,” said Mr. Moss. “I look forward with great anticipation to the outcome of this study. The results will definitely be illuminating and possibly shocking which will alter the balance of stress somewhat. We all will learn a great deal from this deserving corporation’s research.”
This study of life purpose will consider where the universe is, how favorite colors affect anything, when the party ought to begin, who will become Prime Minister of Lithuania, why there are no Martian women, and what eggplants are doing here anyway. These issues will first be addressed from the perspective of the general populace (who will be canvassed inadequately to ascertain their position), and then from your particular situation. In order to promote peace and stability, information must be created to allow for general understanding.
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posted by A Scottish Whisper at 11:48
3 Comments:
If I correctly remember the clips sent out by U.S. History I students, HLJM, Martians suffered from the opposite difficulty...:-)
You know, since you corrected the blog, my comment is now incorrect.
Well...I appear to be placed upon the horns of a dilemma...
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